Adventures in Single Motherhood

Mark is in San Francisco this week at a VS Live Conference. For those of you who aren't familiar this is where geeks and techies and software developers of all kinds get together and salivate over number sequences (Just kidding. No one programs in binary anymore). Seriously though, it is a bunch of "techie geeks" talking about software development and technology. And they do salivate.

Anyhoo, since Mark is gone I am playing single mother and I do not like it one bit. I absolutely don't know how Roxann does this with Spencer gone all the time. I asked my mom how she did it when dad used to work on the road and she said she didn't. She literally went crazy and had to be heavily medicated. Now, I love my kids and I try to be pretty laid back with them, but I also have never been known for my patience or sanity and I can go from fine to overwhelmed and on the edge of a breakdown in about 3 seconds.

Mark and I have a pretty good routine down. He goes to work and I stay home all day with the kids. When he gets home instead of flipping on the sports channel or the Xbox360 like a lot of dads we know he actually engages with the children and often takes over their care. If I have had an especially rough day he sends me to my room for some alone time. We do all the shopping together since it is hard for me to go to the store with the kids. Mark gives them their baths and tells them stories and I help him put them to bed. Three times a week instead of complaining about how he never gets time to play golf or WoW he takes the kids while I go to ballet. And almost every week he tries to get a babysitter and take me out.

You see, Mark gets it. He absolutely gets that being with kids 24/7 with no time to yourself, no matter how much you love them, is hard. He gets that they are his kids too and just because he goes to work doesn't mean he has done his job and now he may go and do whatever he wants. He gets that his number one priority is his family and building a strong relationship with his children. He gets that I didn't stop being a human being with my own needs and wants the minute I became a mother.
Maybe if he was a less hands on parent and he and I were less obsessed with spending every waking moment together this would be easier for me. But you know, I'm glad I'm so dependent on him. I'm glad that he is so much a part of my life that 4 days without him has been agony.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Tomorrow I am flying out to San Francisco to join him for the weekend. Our families have pitched in to take care of the kids for us and I am looking forward to 3 days together (thank you to everyone).

Mark rocks.