Mark is in San Francisco this week at a VS Live Conference. For those of you who aren't familiar this is where geeks and techies and software developers of all kinds get together and salivate over number sequences (Just kidding. No one programs in binary anymore). Seriously though, it is a bunch of "techie geeks" talking about software development and technology. And they do salivate.
Anyhoo, since Mark is gone I am playing single mother and I do not like it one bit. I absolutely don't know how Roxann does this with Spencer gone all the time. I asked my mom how she did it when dad used to work on the road and she said she didn't. She literally went crazy and had to be heavily medicated. Now, I love my kids and I try to be pretty laid back with them, but I also have never been known for my patience or sanity and I can go from fine to overwhelmed and on the edge of a breakdown in about 3 seconds.
Mark and I have a pretty good routine down. He goes to work and I stay home all day with the kids. When he gets home instead of flipping on the sports channel or the Xbox360 like a lot of dads we know he actually engages with the children and often takes over their care. If I have had an especially rough day he sends me to my room for some alone time. We do all the shopping together since it is hard for me to go to the store with the kids. Mark gives them their baths and tells them stories and I help him put them to bed. Three times a week instead of complaining about how he never gets time to play golf or WoW he takes the kids while I go to ballet. And almost every week he tries to get a babysitter and take me out.
You see, Mark gets it. He absolutely gets that being with kids 24/7 with no time to yourself, no matter how much you love them, is hard. He gets that they are his kids too and just because he goes to work doesn't mean he has done his job and now he may go and do whatever he wants. He gets that his number one priority is his family and building a strong relationship with his children. He gets that I didn't stop being a human being with my own needs and wants the minute I became a mother.
Maybe if he was a less hands on parent and he and I were less obsessed with spending every waking moment together this would be easier for me. But you know, I'm glad I'm so dependent on him. I'm glad that he is so much a part of my life that 4 days without him has been agony.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Tomorrow I am flying out to San Francisco to join him for the weekend. Our families have pitched in to take care of the kids for us and I am looking forward to 3 days together (thank you to everyone).
Mark rocks.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Monday, February 9, 2009
In the Spirit of Births
The other night while we were having prayer Mailee prayed for Grandma and Papa, but she didn't stop there like she usually does. You see, Mailee seems to only like Grandma and Papa and so she never prays for anyone else no matter how much we prompt her. She doesn't even pray for Mark and I or Brick. Well, this night was different. She also prayed for her new cousin Maggie (ahh, that is so sweet). Then she prayed that Heavenly Father would give her a new "PJ Sparkles" toy for her birthday (not until April). Then she prayed for a baby sister.
It went from sweet to cute to What the Heck! You can't just let your kid go around praying for siblings. What if Heavenly Father decides to give them one? Or worse yet, what if they don't get one and it shakes their whole belief system? So, Mark explained to her that we can ask for things but that doesn't mean we will get them. Then he told her to stop praying for toys. She hasn't prayed for any toys since then, and she has only prayed for a new sister once since then, but she continues to pray for baby Maggie every night. I think she is branching out.
To be fair, Mailee is only obsessed with babies because 4 of her 7 married aunts are either pregnant or have just delivered a baby. She has babies on the brain. I've been thinking a lot about babies myself and eventually I do want another one. We just aren't ready yet.
Speaking of babies, my friend Rachel just had a baby (congratulations) and apparently it was one of those really difficult births where things wouldn't have turned out well without medical intervention. She had a C-section and it was probably the only way both of them would have made it out alive. I mentioned to her my mother-in-law's views on home births and she asked me if I had done home births. Let me state here for all the world to see that I have never nor will I ever have a home birth. I love epidurals. I think they are one of the greatest creations known to man. I love having nurses to take your baby to the nursery for you if you need some sleep. I love how they pamper you and give you pain medication and sleeping pills and cable tv to watch. I love having my babies in the hospital. I don't mean to be overly dramatic about Rachel's situation, but I feel really strongly about maternal safety. I think a good percentage of home births are reckless and stupid and selfish and put either the mother or the baby in danger. I am completely biased, and I base that bias on the women I know who have gone through with a home birth. I consider it nothing short of divine intervention that these babies survived.
Okay. I'm done ranting. In the spirit of trying to be tolerant and loving, if any of you decide to have a home birth I will try to support you. But, please, for the love of all that is holy, educate yourself as much as you can about the birthing process, get prenatal care, and please, please at least get a mid-wife. Birth is a natural process and women use to do it all the time without medical help, but they also use to die all the time.
It went from sweet to cute to What the Heck! You can't just let your kid go around praying for siblings. What if Heavenly Father decides to give them one? Or worse yet, what if they don't get one and it shakes their whole belief system? So, Mark explained to her that we can ask for things but that doesn't mean we will get them. Then he told her to stop praying for toys. She hasn't prayed for any toys since then, and she has only prayed for a new sister once since then, but she continues to pray for baby Maggie every night. I think she is branching out.
To be fair, Mailee is only obsessed with babies because 4 of her 7 married aunts are either pregnant or have just delivered a baby. She has babies on the brain. I've been thinking a lot about babies myself and eventually I do want another one. We just aren't ready yet.
Speaking of babies, my friend Rachel just had a baby (congratulations) and apparently it was one of those really difficult births where things wouldn't have turned out well without medical intervention. She had a C-section and it was probably the only way both of them would have made it out alive. I mentioned to her my mother-in-law's views on home births and she asked me if I had done home births. Let me state here for all the world to see that I have never nor will I ever have a home birth. I love epidurals. I think they are one of the greatest creations known to man. I love having nurses to take your baby to the nursery for you if you need some sleep. I love how they pamper you and give you pain medication and sleeping pills and cable tv to watch. I love having my babies in the hospital. I don't mean to be overly dramatic about Rachel's situation, but I feel really strongly about maternal safety. I think a good percentage of home births are reckless and stupid and selfish and put either the mother or the baby in danger. I am completely biased, and I base that bias on the women I know who have gone through with a home birth. I consider it nothing short of divine intervention that these babies survived.
Okay. I'm done ranting. In the spirit of trying to be tolerant and loving, if any of you decide to have a home birth I will try to support you. But, please, for the love of all that is holy, educate yourself as much as you can about the birthing process, get prenatal care, and please, please at least get a mid-wife. Birth is a natural process and women use to do it all the time without medical help, but they also use to die all the time.
Birthday Shouts
First off, Sharel and Andrea- Happy Late Birthdays. I'm sorry I didn't get to posting about them, but I am excited about them none the less.
Second-
Happy Birthday to Roxann, yesterday, Korynn, today and Me, tomorrow. I won't make any jokes about getting old, since I am starting to feel a little old myself. And, since I am older than my husband I will always feel old and I will die a little inside every time I have a birthday and he stays the same age. I am completely positive that at 40 he will be a stunning fox with salt and pepper hair and all of Mailee's friends will think he is so hot. At 40 I will be frumpy and look so much like a mom that I might as well walk around with a sign that says "Mom."
Third-
In case I don't get around to it- Happy Birthday to Eryn (who is 6 years old and won't be reading this anyway) and my friend Rachel who share a birthday on Valentine's Day.
Yeah for Birthdays!
Second-
Happy Birthday to Roxann, yesterday, Korynn, today and Me, tomorrow. I won't make any jokes about getting old, since I am starting to feel a little old myself. And, since I am older than my husband I will always feel old and I will die a little inside every time I have a birthday and he stays the same age. I am completely positive that at 40 he will be a stunning fox with salt and pepper hair and all of Mailee's friends will think he is so hot. At 40 I will be frumpy and look so much like a mom that I might as well walk around with a sign that says "Mom."
Third-
In case I don't get around to it- Happy Birthday to Eryn (who is 6 years old and won't be reading this anyway) and my friend Rachel who share a birthday on Valentine's Day.
Yeah for Birthdays!
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